The Calculated Relation: When Gratitude Becomes a Debt
In the journey of life, we often encounter people who expect gratitude, loyalty, or even lifelong indebtedness for their actions. These expectations can come from anywhere—parents, superiors, friends, or subordinates. But when a gesture of love or support becomes a transaction, does it still retain its purity?
Gratitude, in its true form, is spontaneous and heartfelt. But when demanded, it turns into something else entirely—a loan that never gets fully repaid. This is the trap of the calculated relation, where every act of kindness comes with a silent invoice.
Take for instance a mother who demands recognition or repayment for the care she gave. If her nurturing came with expectations, was it really love? Or was it an emotional investment she made, hoping for a return? Love, by nature, is unconditional. The moment we put a price on it, it ceases to be love and becomes a contract.
A child never chooses their mother based on color, beauty, or status. Their affection is raw and unfiltered, rooted in innocence.If mothers love has a price then why is there no price tag for childs love. But too often, societal norms have conditioned even parents to view their role through a lens of sacrifice and return. This imbalance challenges the very core of human connection.
When someone claims back the value of a deed done for us, it’s a reflection that they didn’t truly give—they only transacted. They were adhering to an invisible rulebook of social supply and demand, not engaging in the selfless act of love or support.
True love and duty do not come with terms and conditions. The only real return for love is the warmth of the moment it created. If we can learn to give without expectations, to love without keeping score, and to help without seeking validation, then perhaps we’ll move closer to genuine human connection.
Let’s strive for relationships not rooted in accounting but in affection. Because love, in its truest form, is priceless.
Remember we do not kiss the Bank Manager who gave us loan but we remember the service he gave at the moment, If we turn our love as loan then do not expect a kiss because everyone tries to pay off loan as soon as possible.
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